Throughout her prolific career from the 1980s until her death in 2021, author, cultural critic, and feminist thinker bell hooks (stylized in lowercase) often explored personal identity, self-actualization, and the transformative power of love. This quote comes from her influential 2000 book “All About Love: New Visions,” in which she adds, “When we can be alone, we can be with others without using them as a means of escape.” Emphasizing that authentic connection depends on knowing and valuing oneself — so that we can relate to others without using them to run from our own solitude — hooks reminds us that being comfortable in our own company makes it easier to build healthy relationships.