The seismic shift caused by a separation or divorce can be incredibly challenging, both in our day-to-day lives and for our big-picture plans and goals. For some people, the end of a long-term commitment can be as traumatic as a death, so it’s important to allow ourselves the time and grace we need to grieve the loss of the future we’d planned, to understand and process our emotions, and to reframe our lives moving forward.
It can be especially tricky to make the leap from being part of a couple to being single when it feels as though everyone around us is paired off and thriving. It’s important to remind ourselves that, no matter how hard it might be in the moment, the end of a romantic relationship can mark the beginning of a new and exciting chapter in our lives.
Still, pivoting to an unfamiliar and unexpected stage can bring on a roller coaster of emotions. We may experience intense shock and grief over our loss, or anger and fear at having to start over and face the unknown — all alongside feelings of hope and even joy at the possibilities that have opened up for us.
If you’re ready to move forward after a separation or divorce, these 17 insightful quotes can help you gain some refreshing perspective on your tangled feelings and your new life.
When one of you wanted one life, and the other wanted something completely different, there was a technical term for that: irreconcilable.
Laying blame is so easy. I don’t have time for hate or negativity in my life. There’s no room for it.
It’s hard to admit that a marriage might be over when the love is still there. People are led to believe that a marriage ends only when the love has been lost. When anger replaces happiness. When contempt replaces bliss. But … we’re just not the same people we used to be.
No matter how painful, divorce, like all endings, opens the door to new beginnings.
You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.
All divorce does is divert you, taking you away from everything you thought you knew and everything you thought you wanted and steering you into all kinds of other stuff.
There ain’t no way you can hold on to something that wants to go, you understand? You can only love what you got while you got it.
I do not believe that there were more happy marriages before divorce became socially acceptable, that people tried harder, got through their rough times, and were better off. I believe that more people suffered.
Moving on isn’t always about speeding enthusiastically forward so much as it’s about having one foot on the gas and the other on the brakes — releasing and accelerating in turn.
Heartbreak is loss. Divorce is a piece of paper.
Taking a thing apart is always faster than putting something together. This is true of everything except marriage.
Freeing yourself was one thing; claiming ownership of that freed self was another.
I’m movin’ on / At last I can see / Life has been patiently waiting for me / And I know / There’s no guarantees, but I’m not alone.
Divorce isn’t such a tragedy. A tragedy’s staying in an unhappy marriage, teaching your children the wrong things about love. Nobody ever died of divorce.
All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.
Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.
There are some trajectories you cannot change, no matter what you do.
Jodi Picoult and Jennifer Finney Boylan
Featured Image Credit: simplehappyart/ iStock
Kristina Wright
Kristina is a coffee-fueled writer living happily ever after with her family in the suburbs of Richmond, Virginia.
